Mitt Romney, This Man. . . This Monster!

When Harry Reid made the wildly incredible claim that Romney hadn’t paid taxes in 10 years, perhaps he failed to mention that the taxes in particular were tobacco and alcohol taxes. We all know what a dirty business politics is especially during campaigns, so the Dems must be tearing their collective hair out trying to find something dastardly with which they can smear their otherwise wholesome opponent.

In a recent column, Ann Coulter astutely observed that Mitt Romney is so deficient in the area of compromising scandals that the Dems are reduced to turning mild and ordinary behavior into something dark and insidious. But it takes a creative mind to turn the mundane into the ungodly, something I happen to think is right up my dark alley. Besides, I think I’ve got something that that has viral potential, and I’ve always wanted to go viral.

Who remembers Chuck Norris Facts, that internet phenomenon that helped create the concept of internet memes? It spread across the web in 2005 and made its way into the popular culture with lines like, “When Chuck Norris does pushups, he doesn’t lift himself up. He pushes the world down.” So let’s get started with the next internet sensation, “Mitt Romney Facts. (as told by the Democrat Party)”

• Mitt Romney saw an R-rated movie
• Mitt Romney was assessed a $1.75 library fine
• Mitt Romney once yelled at Mr. Rogers
• Mitt Romney opens up Oreos and eats the frosting first
• Mitt Romney was seen with the Sports Illustrated swimsuit issue

Ok, I’ve got the ball rolling. Viral City, here we come!

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